11 Tips For Managing Summer Stress
It’s okay to have mixed feelings about summer break.
On one hand, you might be looking forward to a less busy schedule with your kids, and more quality family time.
On the other hand, as summer stretches on, you might feel frustrated or overwhelmed by the constant presence of your kids at home, along with the noise, arguments, and neediness that can come with it.
We don’t acknowledge or normalize this duality in parenting nearly enough.
Of course we love our kids.
It’s also natural to want some quiet and time to ourselves.
Sometimes, it’s hard to manage the long stretch of summer, even with camps and planned activities.
The Challenges We Face:
Do you relate to any of these common feelings?
• “I love my kids, but summer is overwhelming with so much free time.”
• “My child always seems to need something. I can’t get a moment of silence or accomplish anything in peace.”
• “I’m tired of hearing that my kids are bored. I want them to be more independent and play on their own. I don’t always have the time or energy to play with them as much as they would like. Sometimes, I feel bad about that.”
• “Even though I have activities and chores for my kids, they still get bored and fight. The noise and conflict is too much for me.”
• "I’m tired about fighting over screen time or feeling guilty that I’m letting my kids have too much screen time."
• “I’m not a mean parent. I want to stop feeling so stressed. How can I shift my perspective and enjoy this time more?”
Here are 11 Tips for Managing Summer Stress:
1. Create a Schedule:
Establishing a daily routine can create more structure, predictability, and security for everyone in the family, especially if you have younger kids. Here’s a sample schedule with a variety of activities you can adapt to your needs:
Wake up/brush teeth
Breakfast
Chores
Active time
Free time
Lunch
Learning time
Quiet time
Technology time
Games/crafts
Dinner
Bedtime preparation/Wind down time
Bedtime
For many children, having more movement and physical activity in the morning works well. Adjust the schedule based on your children’s energy levels and your needs and preferences.
In a few families I worked with, sibling fighting, hitting and roughhousing were an indication that the quieter activities the children were being asked to do in the mornings were not active enough. When the parents changed the schedule to include chores and more physical play in the earlier part of the day, the sibling fighting reduced considerably.
2. Implement Quiet Time:
Scheduling 1-2 hours of quiet time in the mid-afternoon can provide a much needed break for everyone. Children can engage in quiet activities in their rooms.
3. Introduce a “Things to Do When Bored” List:
Make a list of activities your kids can do alone or with a sibling with minimal supervision. Brainstorm ideas with your children if they are old enough, so they are even more invested in engaging in these activities.
Examples: reading, writing, activity books, building, playing with toys, art/crafts, puzzles, games, cooking/baking, learning something new, organizing or decorating their room, playing an instrument, playing with a pet, or completing creative challenges (see #4).
4. Creative Challenges:
To keep kids engaged and stimulate their minds, give them creative projects to complete. Some simple examples are building the tallest tower they can with a deck of cards, or creating a video about a new toy or invention they dream up.
5. Try an Outing Jar:
Write down all the activities you and your children want to do and put them in a jar. Pick one or two days a week to draw from the jar and make it an outing day.
6. Plan Special Days:
Schedule themed days like library day, cooking day, or field day. These give children something to look forward to and break the monotony.
7. Encourage Responsibility and Independence:
Fostering independence can reduce your workload and help children grow. Children, even as young as 3 or 4, can handle some chores and responsibilities, especially if they are helping you.
Some families like to assign certain chores each day. Others let kids pick one or two chores to complete that day from a bigger list.
Encourage your children to manage their own snacks, crafts, and activities where appropriate. For younger kids, make food and supplies easily accessible.
8. Seek Support for Childcare:
It’s not always easy to admit, but sometimes, we need extra help or a break from our kids. Consider hiring a babysitter or mother’s helper for a few hours each day, arranging playdates, or kid swapping with other parents to take turns watching all the kids for a few hours once a week.
9. One-on-One Time:
Some repeated interruptions and sibling conflicts can be reduced by dedicating specific times to give your children individual attention. When children have this time, they feel more connected to you, and have less need to seek that connection in more problematic ways.
10. Set Bedtime Boundaries:
Setting a consistent bedtime not only ensures your kids are getting enough sleep, but also frees you up to relax and recharge in the evenings.
11. Prioritize Self-Care:
Self-care is crucial for maintaining your sanity and well-being. Make time for activities that nurture you and bring you joy and relaxation. Self-care can be as simple as wearing earplugs to reduce overwhelming noise, stretching, reading a book, taking a short walk, or reaching out to a friend. Identify the activities that you most enjoy.
Don’t let the perfect pictures on social media convince you that everyone else has it all together. If you’re feeling stressed this summer, you’re not alone. Many parents share these struggles, even if they don’t openly admit it.
Wishing you an enjoyable and more manageable summer!
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